Random Update - "This is just our life"

So I know that things have been more than a bit quiet around here when it comes to me actually ranting or raving about what is going on and although I could say this is simply because things have been very busy lately, I don't know how true that is. I have been able to keep up with posting neat things I find and have done a few reviews here and there, but I also feel like I have begun to get to this place where things are feeling really comfortable. Don't get me wrong, I have been thrown some real wing-dingers in the last few months, but as far as our home educating goes I think we have really gotten to this place of "this is just our life."

Maybe it is that KM is getting older and really taking responsibility for her education or the fact that I am working again or that we have found the perfect balance for our family or it could be something entirely unbeknownst to me. Whatever it is I really like this place! I like not having to nag and worry about lessons being completed. I like that I can run errands and know that when I return she will have her lessons done - and maybe even a few chores! I like that we can ditch the lessons and head to the movies because we will get to the lessons tonight or later in the week or on the weekend and that is perfectly fine - with both me and her!

Now don't get me wrong, not everything is sunshine and rainbows - or as KM would say "lollipops, candy canes, rainbows and Fluttershy"! There are days when things don't go right, personalities clash, or tragedy strikes, but these do not have anything to do with our educational choices, this is just our life!

Turn the clock back 5 years and you would see a completely different household. When things went wrong, they REALLY went wrong! We didn't know what mellow was because all we did was fight over homework or behavior or chores or school behavior or getting up in the morning or going to bed on time or you name it and we probably had one whopper of a battle over it. I thought for a long time that that was just our life. That was just the way it had to be. Luckily though I had an epiphany. I knew I had to change something so I made the decision that has altered our lives to what I feel it truly should have been from the beginning!

I do not regret having sent KM to school because I truly believe that there was a reason for it - if nothing else it has made us appreciate this path so much more! I am grateful that we have been able to find our life and we can enjoy living it to the fullest each and every day! 

Some things we have been thinking about lately...

So you might remember the post from just a week or so ago about KM wanting to be more independent and schedule her own week, well she has decided that she doesn't want that responsibility any longer. Personally, I thought she was doing a decent job, but she was feeling a bit overwhelmed by it and really didn't like that she was doing lessons 6 days a week instead of 4. She has asked if we can go back to the previous setup ~ me giving her the weekly list, which is broken up into four days for her ~ but instead of her doing things right off the bat in the morning, she can do them whenever she wants throughout the day. This is TOTALLY fine with me. However she wants to get her lessons done is up to her. She is starting to really understand that she is in charge of her learning.

A few days ago I was asked by a friend what I would do if KM didn't want to do "lessons" anymore and I was a bit taken aback by this one, as I had no idea what I would do and honestly had never thought of it. There have been programs that she has decided that she doesn't want to complete for whatever reason and that is totally fine. However I don't know, for sure, what I would do if she just flat out didn't want to do any of it.

I think that if she really and truly didn't want to do any lesson work, then I would talk to her and see why she felt that way and/or what her plan would be moving forward. As I also mentioned in previous posts, I truly don't feel like you can force anyone to "learn" anything. You might be able to get them to memorize something or test through something, but in order for them to truly absorb, understand and retain it, they have to be invested and interested. I don't think that my feelings on this will ever change.

Having gone to school and having always done work with me over summers and during vacations, it has just always been the norm for her to do academic studies. She really enjoys the programs that we use. She has a huge hand in the decision making process and makes the final picks on what she will be using, as she is the one that has to do it and why would I want to waste money on something that I would have to fight with her to get done. She is even liking the writing workbook that she has been doing - Spectrum Writing, Grade 8 - which is a huge find! She has goals that she has set for herself and now it is my job to help her get to reach those goals. If for some reason she has a change of heart, I will keep an open-mind and work with her in whatever manner she needs me to. 

Building Time Management Skills

We have been discussing time management skills lately and being in the right mindset to learn. It is rather difficult to truly retain and learn information if you are tired, stressed, or just not interested! We have been going through and streamlining some of the things that she is working on and KM has decided that she would like to try to work on her time management abilities.

There are often mornings were she feels as though she is just going through the motions and not really sure that she is truly learning what she is feeding into her brain. As we have done away with all forms of "busy" work, I was a bit surprised that she came to that realization on her own, but I am learning to trust her and her instincts. I am willing to give anything a try as long as I see that she is putting forth effort in her endeavors.

KM really enjoys doing her lesson work and is often inspired by the programs that she is working on to delve far deeper into areas than I ever thought she would want to. So I am going ahead with her request with all the hopes that she will succeed.

She has asked to be allowed more freedom in the scheduling of our days. Now I must say that I have never been extremely strict with our schedule in any manner. I do request that the work be completed on the day it is assigned, unless we decide to bump one or two things, but have always been more than willing to allow bumping to happen. I am not the mom that says, "No, you can't go to the - fill in the blank - because you have to finish your school work."  I feel like learning should be intertwined with life and not be the be all that ends all of our day to day life. So KM would like to have her assignments given to her all at once at the beginning of the week, rather than daily, so that she can work on them and have them completed by Sunday. CJ and I were a bit hesitant at first, but she has been showing a lot more responsibility lately and decided that if this was truly going to work, we would need to have some sort of consequence set up in the event of a crash and burn situation. We decided to compromise with her and have the assignments due on Saturday, so that if they are not done there will be no social engagements on Saturday evening and ALL work will be completed on Sunday.

I have no problem admitting that I am a bit of a control freak and I will not allow things to get pushed and pushed and pushed to the next week so that then the list of uncompleted tasks is so long that I cannot bring myself to look at it without feeling like I will throw up. I will be having enough trouble allowing the work to possibly pile up even until Saturday, but I am going to force myself to be okay with this. It is not the end of the world, it is only 8th grade!

I think that if this project is successful, she will be a much stronger independent person. I will keep you all updated on our progress. Time management skills are important at all ages and stages of life. How are you helping your child develop stronger skills in this area?